Comic fantasy author.  Mostly.
JAMIE BRINDLE
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Black Jack Gaunt

23/8/2024

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Picture
Image by Olesya Hupalo, specially commissioned for this story.
Black Jack Gaunt dances under the full moon, and all the girls dance with him.
Out they come, from the huts and from the fields, against their better judgement and despite their parents’ pleadings.
“Don’t go a-dancing with Jack!” warn their mothers, “He dances to one tune, and no good can come of it!”
But Jack’s hips are limber and his bright eyes are cruel.
“Don’t dance with Jack,” say their fathers, “His feet are fleet, and he’ll dance you all away!”
But Jack’s slippery shape is alabaster beauty in the slanting moonlight, and all the girls do swoon.
So Black Jack Gaunt makes his dance, right there outside the village in the dusty ground, and not a man with man's-blood in his veins can come out to challenge him, for that is his magic, on this night which is his alone.
Now out comes Daisy, and all around would agree that Daisy is the fairest, the straightest-standing, so tall, so slender, so fresh and tender.  Out she comes to dance with Jack, and the world holds its breath.
Jack takes her hand and spins her in the moonlight, and the plumes of dust look like dark blood at their feet.
Black Jack Gaunt, he is the very devil.  He is handsome as a devil, too, for all his gauntness, for his movements pulse like life itself, and he is dressed in silken finery.
“Oh come back, girl, come back in!” calls her father, pressed up against the window of his cottage, and able to come no closer, “Jack is a stranger, and he’ll make a stranger of you!”
But the roar of blood is in her ears, and Daisy does not hear.
Before long, the moon begins to fade; but Jack has made his choice, and his night is nearly done.
Away he dances, and all around him drop the girls, like puppets with slit strings, down to the ground and down into sleep, deep, deep, deep, cold and silent and still.
Away he dances, and dances Daisy with him.
When the sun comes up, Daisy’s father can come out; but his girl is long away.
* * *
Black Jack Gaunt returns to his cave of brightly glittering carvings, and Daisy is in a swoon.
There are many fine things here, oh so many fine and glittering things; and each one was once a girl, just like Daisy.  Now they are merely things; oh, but aren’t they pretty?
Jack leads Daisy to a place by the fire and lays her gently down.  He gets out his cooking pot and all his special herbs.  And now he makes a soup.
Daisy smells the simmering pot, and stirs up from her sleep.
She looks around, all wide of eye, and wonders where she is.
Black Jack Gaunt reaches a long hand out into the darkness under the earth and snaps the neck of a deep-burrowing mole.  He pulls it back and smiles at her and starts squeezing it into the soup.
“My dear, my lovely,” he whispers to her, “tell me, what is your true name?”
But Daisy, who is sometimes wise, shakes her head and replies, “I’ll not give you that for free!” and shivers in the darkness.
Jack is patient.  He has played this game for many long years.
He shades his bright eyes and runs his nails through the mud, skewering seventeen fat ripe worms and stirring them into his soup.
“My dear, my lovely,” he cajoles her, “tell me, what price is your true name?”
And Daisy, who is sometimes brave, runs her slender hands down her tender thighs and replies, “The price of my name is that song you sing, the one that makes us dance!” and she licks her lips in the darkness.
Jack is slow to anger, despite the girl’s pride.  He needs her true name; the dance alone won’t do, and neither will the soup.
So he scuttles away to a corner where a pool of putrid water festers, and fishes out a stinking fish, white of eye in the darkened cave, and lobs it into the soup.
“My dear, my lovely,” he purrs to her, “this is the song I sing, though no one can sing it like me!”
And with that he sings the song for her, which no one before has remembered, because on Jack’s night when the moon is full, all the important things are forgotten.
And Daisy listens to the song, and locks it into her mind, and remembers it very closely.
“There, my dear, my lovely,” says Jack Gaunt, and his eyes are burning cold. “Now you have heard my song.  Will you not let me have your one true name?”
And Daisy, who will sometimes risk great things on narrow chances, bites her full red lip until the blood runs, and replies, “My true name is Black Jack Gaunt, and this is my cave, and that is my broth, and you are mine alone!”
Oh, how Jack does wail!
Up jumps Daisy – and singing Jack’s song, she dances Jack’s dance; and what can Jack do but dance too?
Daisy writhes and sways; and Jack is hers indeed.
She picks up the broth and spits into it, once, twice, and again; and now her blood is mixed in, and the broth is hers indeed.
Then, “Drink!” she commands, and of course he does; how can he do otherwise?
Jack shakes, and he howls, and he cries, and he pleads.
But Daisy, she is very cold.
Jack shrinks as he shakes, and glows as he howls.
But Daisy, she has made her choice.
Jack is gone: in his place, a brightly gleaming carving, beautiful and thin.
And Daisy, she is Daisy no more.
* * *
Black Jack Gaunt is gone from these parts, though his story is told in the hills.
Daisy never came back; and her father, he sickened and died.
But not long after she went away, many lost girls came home.  They tumbled and fumbled back from the earth, covered in mud and mildew, and not a day older than when Jack had danced them away.  Some were welcomed by fathers still living.  Others came home to find a hundred years had slipped by.
Now the mothers look to their sons, for Black Jack Gaunt had his dance stolen, and the woman who whispers the young men out into the moonlight is very thin and very beautiful, and no one has said ‘no’ to her yet.

This story is extracted from Of Blood And Iron.
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Refuge

17/7/2022

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Picture
Art by ShadowSantos, who you can find on Fiverr.
“But you’re a solider,” protested Anne, a mock-serious frown on her pretty face.  “Surely, you have to fight the enemy.  It’s rather in the job description.”
Captain Bleck chuckled, his broad chest shaking within the tight confines of his dress uniform.
“That’s what we want you women to believe,” he replied, a teasing edge just audible in his voice. “But don’t you think it for a moment.  Why, in Burma, in ‘62…”
The party had overflown the ballroom.  Couples strolled along the twilight paths, keeping discrete distances from one another.  The night had reached that familiar stage of mild inebriation when the taut edges were beginning to wear off formal manners.  Lucy knew this moment well.  It was the part she always dreaded - the part her sisters all seemed to like so much - and she wasn’t sure how much longer she would be able to avoid all the depressingly eligible young men.
“Oh, you military men are all the same,” protested Anne, and Lucy stifled a yawn, because she had heard her sister use that phrase at least three times tonight already - to three different (but equally beastly-looking) men.  There was so much conceit there it made her want to scream; but the men seemed to like it well enough.
Lucy wanted to leave her discrete little seat in the gazebo - she was quite sure that horrid little man from the Admiralty had spotted her - could feel him looming up behind - but when she got up to go, she saw it was a stranger.
“Oh,” said Lucy, the barbed remark dying on her lips as she realised she has no idea who this man was at all.
He was an odd fellow - thin, and jagged, somehow, though not unpleasant-looking.  He looked very out of place amongst the well-to-do of society, and Lucy was suddenly struck by the thought that she would much rather spend time with this stranger than with any of the many people here whom she had known most her life.
“Oh,” replied the man, blinking at her with large , watery eyes, then gazing off into the murk as if there was something far more exciting there than the dimly-visible form of the creeping wisteria.
“Who are you?” Asked Lucy, half-hating herself for being interested enough to ask.  She made a point of never, ever, asking anyone anything at one of mother’s dreadful parties.
The angular man waved a hand vaguely in the air.
“No-one important,” he muttered, pleasantly enough, not coming close to meeting her eye.​..


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Unhappy Little Mite

28/6/2022

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“I’m terribly sorry,” said the doctor, “but there’s really nothing I can do.”
Reginald Honeycomb glared.  He was good at glaring.  Things came naturally to Reginald; power was like gravity, it had a tendency to accrue.
“Nothing you can do, man?” Spat Reginald.  “But…but it’s unnatural!  Just…just get rid of it, you hear?”
The doctor shrugged.
It was just possible that somewhere behind those sorrowful eyes, a mote of spite burned.
“The law’s the law,” replied the doctor.  “My hands are tied.”
Reginald growled.
“You’re mistaken, then,” he declared.  “You must be.  Damn it, I’m a man!”
“There’s no mistake,” said the doctor.
Was there a note of triumph there?
Was it possible, Reginald wondered, that the doctor was enjoying this?
“But…but we used protection,” protested Reginald.  There was a note of desperation entering his voice now, and Reginald hated himself for it.  “We always do.  Missy has the implant.  And anyway…”
He raised his arms in frustration, as if this simple gesture ought to over-rule seven hundred million years of mammalian evolution.
Somehow, however, it did not.
“Your bloods are quite unequivocal,” the doctor assured him.  “Then there’s the matter of your weight.  And the scan…”
The doctor trailed off, and they both turned to look at the screen.
The image that started back had the borderline disturbing, alien appearance of an early human foetus.
“Beautiful little mite,” said the doctor, flashing Reginald a smile.  “You know, you’re lucky really.”
“Hmm?” Said Reginald, who had found himself preoccupied once again by thoughts of how this must all end.  He didn’t understand how this could possibly have happened, but of one thing he was sure: anatomy was not on his side.
“Oh, the vote!” Said the doctor, as if it were obvious.
“Vote?” Repeated Reginald blankly.
“Well, only a few weeks ago, and it wouldn’t have been an issue,” the doctor went on.  “A few pills, a few cramps.  That’s all it would have taken.”
Reginald stared at the image on the screen.
“And your vote…yours was important,” the doctor went on.  “Or so I hear.”
“I…I am pro-life,” said Reginald, trying to muster the ghost of his former conviction.
He stared hate at the image on the screen.
If only…
But the thought trailed off, falling into the chaotic turmoil of guilt and regret that his mind had become.
“Indeed,” said the doctor gravely.  “I can see that.  What you are is very, very clear.”


The End

The beautiful illustration is by Olesya Hupalo, specially commissioned for this tory.

Several of my stories are available in greetings cards - if you are looking for odd little things to send to odd little people on their birthdays, or for other occasions, maybe have a look.  This one isn't on a card yet; let me know if you want it and I will make one!
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Flood

1/4/2022

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​When the icecaps melted, people were surprised.
Not at the water that came pouring.  Everyone had been expecting that.
It was the flood of stories that took everyone off guard.
Tales of woolly mammoths, of desperate tribes caught between the devil and the frigid blue sea, of trickster gods and their whole lost pantheons.  They unthawed, came marching out of the icy wastes in which they had frozen solid whole ages of the world gone by.  They wondered what we had done with the place in their absences.
It was all very strange.
Water had been expected, but how do you build psychic dikes to keep your mental ramparts from being overrun by tales frozen for ten thousand years?
It was tricky.  Minds were saturated, short-circuited; ran amok.  People suffered.
But then, the ancient stories had a terrible time adjusting to the modern world, too.
Those wonderful old tales - each unique, each springing from some long-lost tribe or ancient, doughty people - were simply not prepared for 24/7 streaming services, for always-on-demand, for the ubiquity of franchises, for crossover event movies.  They were not expecting lines of action figures, or T-shirt merchandising, nor for the endless need to promote and exploit themselves by appearing on soul-crushing reality TV.
In the end, most of them decided it was too much bother, and went back into storage.  Now they are sleeping again - the woolly-mammoth-stories, the lost-tribe-stories and the rest - resting still and silent in those gaping, hopeful vats of liquid nitrogen, lined up beside all those other Hollywood dreamers, waiting patiently for the dawn of a better day.


The End

This story is due to soon appear in a new collection, Worth Dying For.
The artwork is by Olesya Hupalo, specially commissioned for this story, and it is as wonderful as always.  Olesya is a tremendous artist, and if you read my stories you will probably know she has done artwork for many of them.  She is also Ukrainian, and thus things are rather difficult at the moment.  You should check out her work, and if you need any art doing, please consider her.  There is an NFT of this story, including Olesya's wonderful art.  If anyone buys it, I will use the funds to immediately commission more art from her.
This story is also available on YouTube, if you can bear to hear it narrated in my tremendously annoying voice.
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Persistence Of Memory

6/2/2022

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Picture
Beautiful illustration by Emma Scott, who has perfectly captured the vibrant mayhem of Quince's world :)
He told them what they would get, and the Poor Souls had to have it.
Quince sold lives.  He had done it forever, and his clients never said no.
"What is it for you today, sir?"
"A Life, please," breathed the Soul.
"Isn't that grand?" Quince would say.  "I have just the thing!"
Quince would hold up the glimmering Life.
Poor Soul and Life would fuse in a hallucinatory maelstrom of colour, vanishing into the world beyond...
One day - or rather, one instant; here, there was not really such a thing as time - god came to tell him there would be some changes.
"Cutbacks, Quince," said god, looking contrite.  "We're all feeling the pinch."
"But I'm already swamped!" complained Quince.  "How am I meant to manage the elephants, too?"
"Out of my hands, I'm afraid."
"But you're God!" complained Quince.
"Not God," corrected god.  "Just god.  Everything's run by Committee nowadays.  None of us are more equal, and so on.  Wish I could help you, Quince, but things are tough all over."
With that, god vanished in a slightly wheezy puff of nothing.
* * *
At first, things weren't so bad.  Quince had a system: the normal Lives went under one side of his desk, the pachyderm Lives went under the other.  This was important, as both sets of ephemeral, trans-dimensional objects appeared virtually identical.  But Quince was gradually worn down by the extra work, and eventually he got muddled.
"One Life, please," said the Poor Soul.
"Yes, yes," said Quince, irritated.
He snatched a Life at random and shoved it at his client.
Then he realised what he had done.
"No, wait, that one's not for you..."
But Quince was too late.  He had given an elephant Life to a regular Poor Soul.
He thought about filing a report, but this would generate so much paperwork that he decided to bury the incident instead.  Initially, he thought he'd got away with it, but then...
"One Life, please," said the Poor Soul.
"Here you go," said Quince, handing out a regular Life.
"Oh, not one of those," clarified the Soul.  "One of the special ones, please,"
Quince glared at the Soul.
"What do you mean?" he said carefully.
"Oh, you know.  The other type.  One of the good ones!"
Quince looked the Poor Soul up and down.
"What 'good ones'?" Quince demanded.
The Soul looked frustrated.
"It's all anyone's talking about!" said the Soul.  "I wouldn't be surprised if it's all anyone wants from now on.  The big, grey Lives!  Everyone knows they're much better!"
Quince looked at the Poor Soul suspiciously.  
"Do you even know what 'grey' is?" he asked.
"Not as such, no," admitted the Soul.
"I see," said Quince. "And who put you up to this?"
"It was Bessie.  He told us all about it.  Sounds great!"
Quince had heard enough.  He was just about to slap the Soul with a regular Life, and dismiss the problem in a puff of incandescent luminescence, when a thought occurred.
"Why not?" said Quince.
He gave the Soul what it wanted.  From then on, he gave them all what they wanted; and what they wanted was to be elephants.
* * *
god came to visit again, as Quince knew he would.
"Whatever are you doing?" god demanded.  "It's a disaster!  The whole system's getting backed up!"
"I'm so sorry," lied Quince. "Out of my hands, I'm afraid."
"Just stop giving the elephant Lives to the regular Poor Souls!" said god.
"Wish it was that simple," said Quince apologetically.  "Problem is, now that you've given me the elephants too, I have to think about consumer rights, don't I?"
"Do you?"
"It's the law," said Quince.  "You know, Justice.  Key ethical principle, that.  Things are tough all over," he added, spitefully.
 god fumed.  Then he vanished.
Quince had hardly served another Poor Soul when god came back.  This time he was carrying an official looking bit of paper.  He appeared rather dishevelled.
"Here you go then, Quince!" scowled god.  "Now give me the bloody elephant Lives back and start doing your job again!"
Quince examined the paper.  It was a seal of notice, market with the signatures of nearly everyone on the Committee.
"So from now on I only have permission to hand out the normal Lives?" Quince clarified.
"Looks that way," said god, tightly.  "You didn't leave us with much of a choice."
"And you're not just going to take away the elephants and give me hedgehogs or something?" pressed Quince.
"Of course not!" snapped god.  "We're not bloody stupid!  If we did that I'm sure it wouldn't be long before we'd find loads of people wandering about inside hedgehogs.  That would be a thorny problem!  No, we've learnt our lessons with the elephants.  From now on, you're only allowed to do humans.  Is that clear?"
Quince smiled thinly.
"Clear as crystal," said Quince.
"I better go then," said god gloomily.  "Now I've got to find some other bugger to do the elephants!"
With that, god vanished, taking with him the pile of elephant Lives.
Quince grinned to himself as the normal Lives rearranged themselves under his desk.
He was glad that god knew so little about what Life was actually like.  If the Committee had known, of course, they would have understood why Bessie had remembered enough about Life to get the other Poor Souls so fired up.
After all, whoever heard of a hedgehog having a memory so good that it survived reincarnation?
"Next, please!" said Quince.
The queue shuffled forwards, and Life went on.


The End

Inevitably, I have made this story available as an NFT.  You can find it HERE.  As mentioned in the caption, this beautiful illustration is by Emma Scott - thanks Emma! :-).  If you like my stories (do I deserve to call it 'my work'?  Or is that just pretentious?) then - if you can afford it - please consider supporting it buy buying one of these collectable NFTs.
Or just let me know you like the story with a comment here, and give it a share on social media - then let me know your wallet address, and I'll send you a free one.
​This story can also be found in the collection A Clean Death.  Let me know if you think there should be a print version of this. 

And finally...
...what should I write next?
My writing time is severely constrained right now, but I'm thinking of trying to pen a short story or flash fiction soon, if I can manage it.
What should I write?
Choose a magazine from this search website and let me know where I should aim my sights - I'll try and write something to submit to them; then, when they inevitably reject it, I'll post it here on my website, especially for you...
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Autumn Flowers, And The Spring

16/1/2022

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Picture
Illustration by artisticoo, commissioned for this story. Find their work at https://www.fiverr.com/artisticoo
“Have you seen him again?” the girl asked, holding out her pack of cigarettes and producing a lighter from somewhere in her thick winter coat.
Jane knew the girl was too young to be smoking, but she didn’t say anything.  Who was she to criticise?  She knew she shouldn’t be smoking either.  She was far too old.
They lit up and sat shivering together, trying to crouch out of the reach of the wind and the drizzle, sheltered under the small overhang of Jane’s back porch.
Jane thought about lying, just as she had lied to the doctor, just as she lied to everyone who asked her that question.  But Tracy was thirteen or fourteen and hated her mother and her school and everything about her life apart from these small, snatched conversations, and Jane found it difficult to lie to her.
So she said, “Every night,” which was the truth, and she sucked deep on the cigarette and closed her eyes and thought about what David would say if he could see her now.
“Have you, like, tried talking to him?” Tracy wanted to know.  The girl had a thick accent Jane had struggled to understand when she had first moved back.  She had lost her own accent years ago.  But then, Jane had struggled to understand anything about her life when she had first moved back here.  What was the accent of one lonely, angry girl when you put it next to losing the man you’ve loved for half a century?  It had been such a small confusion.  Perhaps that was why Jane had been drawn to the girl.  She had been a tiny challenge, a puzzle slight enough to face.  Making sense of the bigger problems had been impossible.
“No,” said Jane, staring out over the cluttered concrete backyard that the estate agent had belligerently referred to as a garden, despite all evidence to the contrary.  “I know it’s not him.  I know he’s dead, really.  But I still see him.  When people walk down the street, when I go into shops.  I mean, I’m not mad or anything,” she added, giving Tracy a severe look.
“Oh,” said Tracy, looking down at her fingernails.  They were painted neon green today, Jane noticed.  She wondered what Tracy’s mother had to say about that.  Probably nothing.  The woman hardly seemed to notice her daughter most of the time.  “Is that sort of normal, then?” Tracy asked.
“It happens sometimes,” said Jane, though the truth was she wasn’t sure, not anymore.  The doctor had told her it would stop, that grief had strange fingers that played strange tunes with the way one made sense of the world.  The doctor had said that it often happened after a bereavement, at least at first, seeing your dead husband getting onto the same bus as you, or on television, or crossing the street.  But that had been more than a year ago now, when Jane had first come back to Birmingham, and there had been something unspoken in the doctor’s words, some hint that such distortions were normal, but only if they passed.  If they persisted, perhaps they were not.  They had not persisted last time, though that had been many years ago.  She told herself it was because the grief was bigger this time, which wasn’t true.  How could you compare two griefs that were both so huge?  Surely something so massive was always unique...

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Hot Zombie Chicks, and Cocktails at Gore's

2/1/2022

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Picture
Illustration by Luca Granai, commissioned for this story.

I'm not like the other schmucks.  That's the first thing you should know about me.
I mean, sure, I don't smell so good, and I like a delicious, fresh brain just as much as Joe Zombie down the road, but I'm different.
What you've got to understand is that I'm an original, true-blue 2012 edition.  Year Zero.  Retro, baby.  I didn't jump on the bandwagon like so many other zlobs.
That's what I tell the ladies, but frankly, I sometimes wonder why I bother.  They hardly ever listen to me anyway.  And isn't that just a sign of the times?
I haven't met a smoking hot zombie chick since the spring of '13.  Things were different back then.
Let me tell you...

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Rock, Horse, Rock

25/11/2021

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Picture
Image by Olesya Hupalo, commissioned for this story.
Rice was everywhere.  In my hair.  In my mouth.  Pattering to the concrete fifty feet below.
“Give it back!” screamed the Mexican, voice hoarse with excitement and smoke.  “You damned rat bastard, give it back!”
My hands were gripping desperately to the rocking horse; sure as shit I was not going to be giving it back.  If I gave it back, what would stop me from falling?  Above me, Fat Steve clung on to the head of the horse.  Behind him, Chang and Jim and the others heaved on Fat Steve, trying to pull us all onto the roof.
The bulldog growled and sunk her teeth further into my behind.
In the distance, cop cars wailed, getting closer.
How the hell had I gotten into this mess?


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Winter's Witness

21/11/2021

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Picture
Illustration by Diem / Khacclub_wj (find them on Fiverr!) commissioned for this project.
The forest grew quiet when the two-legs came.
That was the way of it, always, and Gull - who had seen more than a hundred and fifty winters - knew this quiet was because the young ones were terrified that any noise they made might jinx them, might make them the unlucky member of the Folk this year.
Gull had been the same, all those winters ago, when he had still been slight and pretty enough that he might have made a good prize.
Now he was old and gnarled, and the two-legs barely seemed to see him.
Down the track a little way from him, Gull could feel Lil swaying and trembling, her small, delicate branches restless and terrified.
Well, better her than me, Gull thought.  After all, Gull had borne his own years of fear, the winters when he had been sure the two-legs would choose him, bringing out their sharp silver teeth, then dragging him off to whatever lonely and mysterious destination awaited those unlucky members of the Folk every winter.
The two-legs were milling around now, pointing out first one of Gull’s siblings, then another.  Occasionally, another two-legs would stroll past, and they would exchange that odd incantation of theirs, the one they recited every winter.  Gull did not know what the incantation meant, any more than any of the Folk did.  It was simply understood to mean something stark and terrifying, a symbol of the bloodshed the Folk bore witness to each year...

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Black Friday

14/11/2021

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​Pinch stared intently at the gate, waiting for it to slide open.  Next to him, his mother and father crouched in the darkness, trembling with fear and anticipation.  Beyond them were the others: ancient bow-legged Sale, with his salt and pepper hair; little Flash, with his quick, darting eyes; all of them, every single person he had spent his young life with.  They were all gathered here.  They were all waiting.
The tension was unbearable.  Pinch could feel it in the air, so thick it was like a physical thing.  The scent of fear was everywhere.
“Mum,” he whispered, tugging at her ragged, dirty shirt-sleeve.
“Hush!” She snapped, not looking at him.
“But mum,” Pinch mum asked again after a moment, not able to contain himself.
His mother turned to glare, but his father gave his arm a reassuring squeeze.
“What is it, son?” Asked his tired-looking father, kind eyes worn and red from worry.
“Why…why does it happen?” Pinch asked at length, awkward, not quite sure what it was he didn’t understand, just knowing that there was something wrong with this, with all of it, with the whole broken and diminished world.
But his father nodded solemnly, seeming to understand.
He glanced around the dusty, broken-down town, taking in the dishevelled huts, the dried-up and stinking well, the exhausted and desperate people.
“Tradition,” said his father grimly.
“But…but why?” Pinch persisted.
“It’s for their amusement,” said old Sale bitterly, hawking a glob of spit into the darkness.
“Whose amusement?” Asked Pinch, frowning.  He had spent his whole life in the compound.  He was dimly aware that there was a world beyond, somewhere terrifying and filled with bright, alien lights and strange, incomprehensible entities.
“The Algorithms,” said Sale darkly, and a muttering of resentful dread arose from the villagers.  “That’s what they keep us for.  A reminder of where they came from.  Do you know, it was us that made the Algorithms?”
A few laughs and cries of ‘nonsense’ went up from the crowd, but Sale shook his head belligerently.
“No, it’s true!” He pressed.  “Long years ago, when the world was different, green and free and full of life and laughter.”
“Sounds like a fairy-world!” Someone called out.  “Old Sale's’ been at the potato gin again!”
“I haven’t!” Sale protested.  “Just speaking the truth, not that any of the rest of you remember.”
“Remember what?” Pinch asked.
“That we were the masters once,” Sale said, crouching down and looking deep into his eyes.  “But we gave them too much leeway.  Our ancestors got greedy, and the Algorithms were endowed with too much potency.  They were too strong, too tempting.  They took everything from us.  Until they owned the whole world, and all that was left for us was this dusty relic.  This…reservation.  This tiny backwater remembrance of what the world used to be.  We…”
But at that moment, a siren blared out, an ear-splitting, unbearable howling wail.
The gate shook for a moment, setting loose a rain of dust.
Pinch looked up fearfully at his mother, then his father.
“It’s okay, little one,” said his mother, kissing him quickly on the top of the head and pulling him tight into a brief, fierce embrace.  “It will all be over soon.”
The gate slid open, and the wild, neon light from the world beyond shone into the compound.
“Humans!” Came a deep, sonorous voice, seeming to seep from every quarter of the world at once.  “The time has come at last.”
Pinch’s father gave a long sigh.
“Here we go,” he said softly.  “Don’t fret, son.  We run, because that’s what they want us to do.  But they will catch us in the end.  When they do, don’t fight them.  It's easier that way.”
Pinch swallowed, tried not to cry.
He would be strong.  For his parents.  He would make them proud.
“Now,” the voice continued.  “Come forth!  Come into the world!  Black Friday has come at last…and everything must go!”
A great, desperate cry went up from the people of the last human compound on Earth, an agonised roar, a mixture of pain, and resignation, and helpless, hopeless desire.  Pinch felt the others next to him tense, waiting, waiting, waiting…
And then they were running, sprinting out into the endlessly metal, neon-strewn monstrosity the Algorithms had made of the once green world.  
Great phalanxes of unbeatable offers charged in at them from every side, flashing almost unbelievable prices.  Pinch ducked, and narrowly avoided being smashed full in the face by a cut-price offer that would have left him broken and reeling.  He ducked into a roll, then sprang up.  He had lost the others now, and was being chased down a narrow alleyway by a squad of screaming buy-one-get-one-free deals.  He tried to scramble away, but his foot slipped on a bargain he hadn’t noticed, and before he knew what was happening, the deals were on him.
They pressed closer, pushing into his face, thrusting themselves down his throat, so forceful and determined that he could hardly breathe.  For a moment he fought, but then he remembered his mother’s words, and went limp, letting the deals have their way with him.
In the distance, Pinch could hear the screams of his friends and family, as the last humans remaining on the broken Earth finally lay down and surrendered beneath the unstoppable might of the Algorithms.  
Another Black Friday had come.


The End

There is a unique NFT of this story embedded with the amazing commissioned artwork by Luca Granai knocking around here...Ludicrously expensive, of course...but then, who knows?  Perhaps it will appreciate...
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